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My first experience of buying CONDOM!!

Updated: Dec 26, 2020

Okay, it looks simple and straightforward and ideally it should be a no-nonsense and normal experience; only it was not. For a guy, living in a small-town place in India, it was a big deal and the experience was nerve-wrecking. Suddenly, “buying a condom” meant exposing your private personal life to the outside world and inviting smirks and judgmental looks from the chemist, shopkeepers.

So, I started planning this mission. First,I need to find a chemist shop which is like at least 5KMs outside the radius of my house. If the shopkeeper knows my parents, he will feel that it’s his moral obligation to tell them about my transgressions. Second, make sure that I have never been to that shop ever in my life. Third, very important – finalize the day and time slot when there would be no customers or like max 2 customers on the shop.

Okay, post careful planning, it was time for execution. And there I was at the Chemist Shop, on a Wednesday, 3:45 PM.  After waiting for 10 minutes and making sure that there were no other customers, I proceeded to purchase the condom.

Me - “Bhaiya, ek condom dena”.

Shopkeeper (Mischievously) - “Kya chaiye?”.

Me - “Bhaiya, Condom.”

Shopkeeper (Now, smirking wide) - “Are, kya baat hai. Aapko yahan pehli baar dekha hai. Kahan se ho?”

Me (Nervously, checking over my shoulder) – “Bhaiya, paas se hi hun. Jaldi se dedo.”

Shopkeeper (Still smirking) – “Kaunsa flavor chaiye. 10 ka ek packet dedun – lamba chalega”.

Me (WTF! Did anyone ask you?) – “Give Durex Ultrathin – Packet with 3 condoms. Aur kuch puchna hai?”

Well, there have been multiple weird conversations and other instances post that. Once I asked a sales rep in a supermart – if Condoms are available, and she was stunned and shocked – “Aap itni loudly condom kaise bol sakte hain!”. Perhaps, this is a result of the stigma associated with discussing about Sex. And this further leads to silence, shame and stigma while discussing and spreading awareness on contraception, thereby increasing likelihood of teenage pregnancies, STDs, etc. Perhaps the answer to these problems is simple – “Sex Education”.

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